I think Mithy has it spot on there Mr G.
However, just to make sure, when I have found myself in the very same situation I always revert to the tried and tested marketing technique known as 'The Bomb Hoax'.
This is sure to cause a certain amount of anxiety and stress which can usually be relieved by a good stiff drink. You starting to catch my drift?
If you're on the ball, you could stand outside and hand flyers to the screaming, panicking masses running for their lives, offering a good establishment to drink away the shock and at the same time catch a few great local live bands.
Hope this helps.
Disclaimer: This forum does not accept responsibility for any explosions caused by its deranged members